MDMA Walking Day
Posted: Sat Aug 06, 2011 10:41 pm
so i posted in the random topic before my buddy mike and i were going to do some mdma soon, and last monday was the day
its taken me a little while to get around to writing up a trip report for you guys, so enjoy!
my mike got a gram of this pale blue-ish gray mdma, everytime iv done m in the past it was pure white. so we googled what could cause the color. some sources said it wasnt an issue. others said it was mixed with speed. either way i didnt care. i wanted to do 2 hits but mike talked me out of it. so we weighed up .15g each and then busted up the crystals into a finer powder.
once we had busted up the m we got ready to parachute the lil packages. pop it in your mouth and have a few drinks of water and youre gooood
we decided to head out of my house before we started feeling the effects on the off chance my room mates and land lord came home.
days before we had decided it would be a mellow walking trip. we would just walk around town following our instincts and talking. ive been pretty depressed these past few weeks, crying bouts have have not been abnormal. and mike knew i wanted to use this mdma trip to deal with a lot of the shit that was hurting me inside. he was totally game with doing a therapeutic trip with me, partially he also wanted a test out the mdmas strength before he sold any of it, but thats besides the point.
we we were walking feeling mighty sober still. and i told mike we should check out this abandon elementary school near my house. as we approached the school i started to feel it.we couldnt break inside because it was the middle of the afternoon. so we just walked around the outside. by the time we got back to the front i was starting to be really high. and of course this is were it gets harder to tell my trip ahhhahaha
sarnia is built along the st clair river and lake huron (one of canadas great lakes) so mike and i decided to start walking towards the water front. we walked down any shady street and followed our feet. totally engrossed with the euphoria that was taking over.
when we finally go to the water front like half an hour later, things got goood.
basically for the next 5 hours we walked along the varying waterfront scenery, (boardswalks, parks, piers, boat loading zones etc) talking and stopping to sit whenever the compulsion would take us. wed smoke a bowl and talk some more, until we felt like the resting was over and we needed to move again.
the things we talked about are of what really interesting to me. and its hard now to explain. there was the usual banter about philosophy. and i tried to explain sacred geometry, but its a new concept to me, so it was hard talking about high as tits. but it seemed crucially important having to do with "the patterns" so i had to attempt to explain it to mike.
im kind of a spiritual person. deep inside of me i have this urge to reconcile science with the soul. my intuition has told me the "truth" about reality and existence can begun to be understood when science and soul are joined and seen as one discipline. i know it will happen one day (if we dont kill ourselves off first). in truth its already started. anyways....
once mike and i started off on the "deep talks" i told him i feel like a fucking shaman when im on drugs. all my receptors are overclocked and it creates a dynamic shift within me. all the inner patterns come forward and temporarily displace the normal everyday outer patterns.
i should take a moment here to explain what i mean by patterns. its kinda like your aura. its like a shifting world of frequencies and shapes that encompasses a person. and its not like one pattern per person, we are all made out of limitless patterns moving folding intersecting and interacting with each other. if i could see these patterns and not just feel them, i think it would be like looking at a kaleidoscope. i dont know what makes up these intricate patterns. im pretty sure that a lot of the patterns are our thoughts; conscious and unconscious. but i know thats way to simple of an explanation. i dont know if the shifting in our thought patterns comes before or after the chemical reactions in our brains. i have some very weak theories on what else our patterns do for us, but they arent even worth discussing til they firm up inside me first.
now these theories on patterns are always with me. i already feel them to a much lesser degree all the time. but when i trip with mike i am able to experience them more strongly because of the strong connection he and i have. it is always incredibly easy for me to read him. so much so that after the trip was over and he went home and i sobered up, im left with confusing feelings. he has been my good friend for 2 years and i know ive loved him as my closest male friend for over a year now. but after the trip and some of the things we talked about (like my 2 exs bfs, and how hard it is to find a mate that is "awake" like i am) i was kinda left thinking that we are two sides of the same coin.....very confused feelings
its taken me a little while to get around to writing up a trip report for you guys, so enjoy!
my mike got a gram of this pale blue-ish gray mdma, everytime iv done m in the past it was pure white. so we googled what could cause the color. some sources said it wasnt an issue. others said it was mixed with speed. either way i didnt care. i wanted to do 2 hits but mike talked me out of it. so we weighed up .15g each and then busted up the crystals into a finer powder.
once we had busted up the m we got ready to parachute the lil packages. pop it in your mouth and have a few drinks of water and youre gooood
we decided to head out of my house before we started feeling the effects on the off chance my room mates and land lord came home.
days before we had decided it would be a mellow walking trip. we would just walk around town following our instincts and talking. ive been pretty depressed these past few weeks, crying bouts have have not been abnormal. and mike knew i wanted to use this mdma trip to deal with a lot of the shit that was hurting me inside. he was totally game with doing a therapeutic trip with me, partially he also wanted a test out the mdmas strength before he sold any of it, but thats besides the point.
we we were walking feeling mighty sober still. and i told mike we should check out this abandon elementary school near my house. as we approached the school i started to feel it.we couldnt break inside because it was the middle of the afternoon. so we just walked around the outside. by the time we got back to the front i was starting to be really high. and of course this is were it gets harder to tell my trip ahhhahaha
sarnia is built along the st clair river and lake huron (one of canadas great lakes) so mike and i decided to start walking towards the water front. we walked down any shady street and followed our feet. totally engrossed with the euphoria that was taking over.
when we finally go to the water front like half an hour later, things got goood.
basically for the next 5 hours we walked along the varying waterfront scenery, (boardswalks, parks, piers, boat loading zones etc) talking and stopping to sit whenever the compulsion would take us. wed smoke a bowl and talk some more, until we felt like the resting was over and we needed to move again.
the things we talked about are of what really interesting to me. and its hard now to explain. there was the usual banter about philosophy. and i tried to explain sacred geometry, but its a new concept to me, so it was hard talking about high as tits. but it seemed crucially important having to do with "the patterns" so i had to attempt to explain it to mike.
im kind of a spiritual person. deep inside of me i have this urge to reconcile science with the soul. my intuition has told me the "truth" about reality and existence can begun to be understood when science and soul are joined and seen as one discipline. i know it will happen one day (if we dont kill ourselves off first). in truth its already started. anyways....
once mike and i started off on the "deep talks" i told him i feel like a fucking shaman when im on drugs. all my receptors are overclocked and it creates a dynamic shift within me. all the inner patterns come forward and temporarily displace the normal everyday outer patterns.
i should take a moment here to explain what i mean by patterns. its kinda like your aura. its like a shifting world of frequencies and shapes that encompasses a person. and its not like one pattern per person, we are all made out of limitless patterns moving folding intersecting and interacting with each other. if i could see these patterns and not just feel them, i think it would be like looking at a kaleidoscope. i dont know what makes up these intricate patterns. im pretty sure that a lot of the patterns are our thoughts; conscious and unconscious. but i know thats way to simple of an explanation. i dont know if the shifting in our thought patterns comes before or after the chemical reactions in our brains. i have some very weak theories on what else our patterns do for us, but they arent even worth discussing til they firm up inside me first.
now these theories on patterns are always with me. i already feel them to a much lesser degree all the time. but when i trip with mike i am able to experience them more strongly because of the strong connection he and i have. it is always incredibly easy for me to read him. so much so that after the trip was over and he went home and i sobered up, im left with confusing feelings. he has been my good friend for 2 years and i know ive loved him as my closest male friend for over a year now. but after the trip and some of the things we talked about (like my 2 exs bfs, and how hard it is to find a mate that is "awake" like i am) i was kinda left thinking that we are two sides of the same coin.....very confused feelings
i enjoyed reading your feelings of euphoria and attempts at explaining the reconciliation between soul and science...