is it the drugs???

[weedguru_animal]

is it the drugs?
or is it just my nature?
that is making me look into the mirror and shout 'I fuckin hate ya'

I’m doing more wrong than Right,
my girlfriend shows me love and affection, but all I wanna do is fight,
I am consciously charging into the dark, though I can see the light....

the body moves through the day to day routine,
I am a responsible worker, though emotionally mean,
My mind is dirty and there seems to be no way of making it clean....

Self destruction,
is that the desired goal?
or do I seek merely some currently unknown method for pacification of the soul?

sometimes I really wonder,
and honestly I don’t know.
if my heart has become stagnant,
or is still able to grow.......

I still Feel,
I just cant seem to express..
I have become wiser,
but the increase in wisdom has been achieved at the cost of emotional output becoming less

generally I like myself,
but Right now my reflection causes despair,
I look deep into the eyes,
ignoring the clothes and the hair,
cos this is the only way that I can see,
a glimpse of what the fuck is really happening to me,
a fleeting vision of a man that however much I try to alter, remains the man who I be...

I welcome thunder,
I welcome rain,
because on some preternatural level,
I feel that only nature can ease my pain...

[r0xley]

Lyrically, the rhyme has a very strong base in terms of the story/message/description you are trying to convey. I got the idea of an overwhelming sense of helpless self-destruction from it, and while I don't mean to sound too morbid, when you think about it most artists do source ideas from pessimistic points of life. In terms of flow and how everything rhymes, it's pretty good but at points I think it faltered during the lines "increase in wisdom...emotional output becoming less". Maybe try and break that line in two, it might work better?

Aside from that, good work I can actually get a sense of what you are feeling and trying to convey when you wrote this, and that in itself is the main goal for most artists.

[weedguru_animal]

thanks roxley...and not just for looking but for making a critical analysis...
this lot were my first ryhmes for a while....i got to get some new semi-synth oil for my rhyming machine.....